Mental load: How’s yours?… and why it matters
Over the past few years, the concept of "mental load" has gotten a lot more attention as a critical aspect of daily life, especially for women. In fact, a recent study from Gether found that 90% of women feel solely responsible for their family’s schedule. Not only that, the mental load of managing the family ‘life admin’ holds women back from their careers - a global challenge - but in Australia alone closing the workforce participation gap could add $30.7 billion to the economy by 2050 according to government estimates.*
But despite the fact that we’re actually talking about it more, most people still can’t articulate what mental load is and how it affects their wellbeing. So let’s unpack what mental load means, why it disproportionately impacts women, and how tools like the new Mental Load Calculator can help lighten the load.
What Is Mental Load?
Mental load refers to the invisible, often unnoticed work involved in managing a career and your health alongside household, family or other responsibilities. It’s not just what you do, but the planning, organising and remembering that go into making sure everything runs smoothly. Like…. remembering to schedule your child’s dentist appointment, making sure there’s food in the fridge and thinking about meals for the week all fall under the umbrella of mental load.
The key aspect of mental load is its mental and emotional weight. It’s the cognitive labor of doing the “life admin" for yourself and others….often on top of your own career…which often goes unnoticed or unacknowledged by others. All while trying to manage your own health and wellness too!
Why Women Bear the Brunt of Mental Load
Studies and anecdotal evidence reveal that women overwhelmingly shoulder the majority of mental load in households, even when both partners work full-time. This imbalance stems from deeply ingrained social and cultural norms that assign caregiving and household management roles to women.
While some progress has been made in addressing gender roles, many women still find themselves as the default organiser and planner. This constant responsibility can lead to:
Burnout: The perpetual need to juggle multiple roles and responsibilities can lead to physical and emotional exhaustion.
Resentment: Feeling unacknowledged or unsupported can create tension in relationships.
Reduced Mental Wellbeing: The stress of carrying a heavy mental load can contribute to anxiety and depression.
Recognising the Signs of Mental Load
Mental load isn’t always easy to identify because it’s invisible and ongoing. Here are some common signs:
You’re always thinking about what needs to be done next.
You feel solely responsible for remembering important dates, appointments, and deadlines.
You often have to delegate tasks to others, adding another layer of responsibility.
You’re exhausted even when the physical workload seems manageable.
How to Address Mental Load
Recognising mental load as a problem is the first step toward alleviating it. Here are some actionable steps:
Communicate with Your Partner: Open conversations about mental load can help your partner understand the invisible work you’re doing and encourage them to share the responsibility.
Delegate More Effectively: Handing over tasks isn’t enough; share the responsibility of planning and decision-making.
Set Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries around your time and energy to prevent overcommitment.
Use Tools to Support You: Leverage resources like the Mental Load Calculator to identify and quantify your mental load. This tool provides a clear picture of the cognitive and emotional labor you’re managing and offers actionable insights for redistributing tasks.
Wellness Strategies to Create Space in Your Mental Load
In addition to addressing mental load directly, incorporating wellness strategies into your daily life can create mental and emotional space. Here are some ideas:
Practice Mindfulness: Set aside time each day for mindfulness practices, such as meditation or deep breathing, to help center your thoughts and reduce stress.
Prioritise Self-Care: Regularly engage in activities that rejuvenate you, whether it’s reading, yoga, taking a walk or something else that brings you joy.
Simplify Your Schedule: Identify commitments that are non-essential and learn to say no (boundaries is my word of 2025!!). Streamlining your schedule can free up time and mental energy.
Use Organisational Tools: Apps and planners can help you keep track of tasks, deadlines, and responsibilities, reducing the mental effort of remembering everything.
Seek Support Networks: Connect with your tribe - friends, family etc - to share and seek advice. Sometimes, simply talking about your mental load can lighten the burden.
Build Rest into Your Routine: Make sure you’re getting enough sleep and scheduling downtime to recharge both mentally and physically.
The Mental Load Calculator: A Game-Changer
The Mental Load Calculator is a powerful resource designed to help women understand and address the weight of mental load. By breaking down daily responsibilities and assigning a tangible value to them, this tool makes the invisible visible. It can serve as a starting point for productive conversations with partners, family members, or colleagues.
Final Thoughts
Mental load is a significant yet often overlooked aspect of women’s lives. By bringing awareness to this issue, using tools like the Mental Load Calculator, and advocating for shared responsibilities, women can take meaningful steps toward reducing the load! Remember, addressing mental load isn’t just about lightening your to-do list—it’s about reclaiming your mental and emotional wellbeing.
Take the first step today: Calculate Your Mental Load.
*Source Womens Agenda - The mental load facing mums isn’t just draining. It’s debilitating